4/20 is back again. With cannabis culture growing larger and more diverse, what kind of weird stoner inventions can you get for you or your friends to celebrate today?
As an Irish man myself, the fundamental shift in American attitudes toward weed in the past decade is surprising. In just a few short years, marijuana has changed from Reagan’s gateway to heroin to a sort of miracle cure-all which, in states like Colorado, Washington, and California, is infused, vaped, and baked into everything imaginable.
Like with most contentious topics and substances, it’s likely that weed falls into the middle of both of these categories.
It’s certain that there are a few health benefits to the drug in some situations and the 60s style “reefer madness” certainly isn’t even close to being a reality. Now, however, a new form of reefer madness is right around the corner.
The State of Colorado gathered $63,688,122 USD worth of legal cannabis taxes in the first three months of 2018.
Today, marijuana is a multibillion-dollar industry in the US. Companies and states are making money hand over fist thanks to the relaxation of anti-marijuana legislation both federally and on the state level.
Stoners have a tradition of being some of the laziest geniuses in the world.
While many stoners might not be able to describe how a television works, they can certainly make a bong out of one.
Stoner geniuses are as real as idiot savants. From cross-room joint-passing mop handles to lighters on a swing, there are some ingenious things coming out of the college dorm room haze.
Combine this ingenuity with the money-rich weed bandwagon and you get hundreds of companies trying to make “getting high” as easy as ordering groceries from Amazon.
As a celebration of all things green, here are some of the most memorable stoner inventions available today:
1. A Chocolate, Edible, Bunny Themed Bong.
Yes, this is an actual product. Marketed towards the Easter season, this edible chocolate bong is a perfect gift for anyone you don’t like.
Apart from issues like the chocolate melting in your hand and bong water ruining the flavor, this chocolate bong also looks like it might last 20 minutes. Keep it in the fridge, and don’t use it.
However, at just $5 each, they could be the perfect gag gift for that in-law that’s kinda okay with weed culture.
2. The Happy 420 Magic Ball
This stoner themed magic ball is, obviously, a comical twist on the classic magic 8-ball.
Anyone who’s asked a stoner what they want on their pizza knows, getting a straight answer can be tough.
You would think this stoner invention would help a little, but with answers like “Heh Heh Heh” and “Yeah..uh..what?” it’ll probably just keep the stoner cycle going.
But, at around $15 a pop, it might be a good buy to pick up for any extremely indecisive stoners out there.
3. Sploofy: The Magic Smoke Filter
Every single stoner on the planet today thinks they can hide the smell from their parents by blowing smoke through a fabric softener sheet. In reality, getting rid of that weed smell quickly is almost impossible.
Apart from just saying you were burning incense or that its just your friend’s weird perfume, you could buy a Sploofy.
This stoner invention was specifically designed to suck up every molecule of that lingering weed smell to make sure that you can smoke in peace. That is until you start worrying about the creaking sound in the attic.
At just $20, this is an excellent purchase for anyone who needs to hide their habit from their friends, family, or RA.
Or, if you’re strapped for cash, you could just make one of these
4. The Cannaboss Suit: For the Formal Stoner
This suit, at a cool $100, is by far the strangest and most expensive stoner invention on this list.
Aside from the fact that someone decided to design and then actually sell this suit, what is even stranger is that people chose to buy and give this a five-star review on Amazon.
Looking at the comments, all of the customers discuss this piece of clothing as if it’s entirely normal to wear a three-piece suit that is literally covered in bright green weed leaves.
So, if you’re on the lookout for an outfit for a formal weed smoking event, this might just be the suit for you.
Weird stoner inventions are one of the greatest things about weed culture at the moment. Hopefully, as marijuana becomes less stigmatized and normalized, this niche culture of weird and wonderful inventions keeps growing even larger.